Thanks British Gas, they're - err

[DaiRees]

I've got one of those PIR switch thingies in there now, so even though there's 300W of halogen in there (and 300W in the extension, but we don't have that one on much ) if you leave the room for more than 30s they go off, then when you walk back in they automatically come back on again . Very handy when you've got your hands full

[steve_earwig]

...9 x 50watters...

Bluddy hell Welters, are you cooking yourselves too!

I like the idea of the PIRs (very office), I'd need one for every damn room in my other half's though (I learned to turn stuff off when I wasn't using it when I was 10, so what's wrong with her ma? Apart from the obvious dribbling senility of course) At least I managed to persuade them that they didn't need 300 watts going to watch tv

[Welly]

I'm just waiting for someone to invent a PIR door closer for my house

And steve - don't speak ill of that senile old dribbler, she'll be your mother in law proper soon

[steve_earwig]

Did you know an anagram for mother-in-law is "woman Hitler"? I just hope being related gives me more say in having the old dear carted off to the happy home for the terminally baffled. Hey, it's just up the road and you can come visit any time you want! (but that would require some sort of effort on your behalf so it might as well be on Mars ).

Here's an idea! We don't have kids here, just these golden retards, there's also 4 doors to the outside world, three on roller catches which they've long since learned how to open so they seemed to spend the whole of last winter smashing one door open, trampling snow and mud through the house, and running out the next leaving Mrs Mad to turn blue. Of course, latching the doors would be too easy...

[Welly]

Reminds me of my Mrs' Grandma when she was alive (such a bloody awkward woman) -

"we'll put a downstairs loo in for you"

No thank you I can manage

"we'll arrange a stair lift"

I suppose so

"how's the stair lift going? it must be a great help"

I don't use it thank you very much

*cart off to funny farm*

"this is nice, look at all the staff to help with everything for you"

When am I going home?