law:

[lozz]

Law Of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Law Of The Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped will roll to the least accessible corner or on your toe.

Law Of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law Of The Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number you never get a busy signal.

Law Of The Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the very next morning you will have a flat tyre.

Variation Law:
If you change lines in a que or traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster then the one you are in now.

Law Of The Bath:
when the body is fully immersed in water the telephone rings.

Law Of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law Of The Result:
when you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

Law Of Bio Mechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Law Of The Theater:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law Of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Law Of Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of a sliced of bread and jam landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law Of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are.

Law Of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Murphy's Law Of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Sods Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

[puggy]

Oh so very true !!!

[sirwiggum]

Some good ones lozz!

Law Of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

Or the phone rings.

Law Of The Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped will roll to the least accessible corner or on your toe.

Small important nut = down into the corner.
Big heavy bit = toe

Law Of The Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number you never get a busy signal.

Or if you get a wrong number, they are convinced you are lying. "You sure you aren't bob?..."

Law Of The Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the very next morning you will have a flat tyre.

Slept in, made up this story that the car wouldn't start and had to get the RAC out.
Then, it got cold overnight.
And the glowplugs went.
Had to get the RAC out the next morning.

Variation Law:
If you change lines in a que or traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster then the one you are in now.

Yep its the same in supermarkets too

Law Of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Had a bit of a close one, went for an interview in the next building where the canteen is. Had to wait in reception, colleagues walking past to get their lunch while I hid my face in some random info leaflet

Law Of The Result:
when you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

I get this all the time in my job software testing, find a bug, show to the developer and it doesn't work. Then you sit for an hour before realising you missed out a step to cause it.

Law Of The Theater:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Or those with the weakest bladder or at a concert the most frequent drinkers

Law Of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Or tea.

Law Of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

I've seen this as an interviewer for jobs, claiming knowledge of something then making it up on the spot doesn't get you very far.

Murphy's Law Of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

And there will only be 1 bench, and the bigger guy will get it, leaving me trying to dry and change on a wet floor.

Sods Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

Big BBQ beans, McDonalds Rib, Subway Rib, Posh Noodle, Onion McCoys, Tudor Specials, XUD engineed cars, a lot of the big mainstream saloons and coupes.