Well he came around (boyfriend of the admin woman at work), cut a hole through the inner wheelarch, welded up the captive nut then welded up the hole. Bolt came out easy as pie with the nut hot, cleaned up the corrosion and now it goes in and out nicely.
So i take the subframe off. Fairly easy, but turned out to be quite time consuming since I had to lower it down in stages on axle stands. It's quite heavy, but liftable one side at a time... Just need to take the 2 PAS hose mounts off, undo the lower engine mount, then unbolt the steering rack. Easy. Also the offside mount captive nut (a big square) turns, but it didn't spin thank god
So then I decide to finish pulling the gearbox out. Not so easy. The thing is the box can come out of the engine about 1.5 inches before the mount hits the bracket. So I lower the engine a bit, and the gearbox can come out of the engine about 2 inches before the mount hits the body. Turns out you need to pull the box about 4 inches from the engine so the gearbox drive shaft clears the clutch plate
So I dropped the engine as low as I dared so it was hanging on by about 1/2 inch of bolt on the top mount. A few hours of faffing about and I had the gearbox on the floor. Sidewards. On top of the jack. Which was sidewards.

Nearly ended up buried IN my head a few times I'll tell you

Also due to the clearance required (but didn't know about at the time) I spent a lot of time faffing about with the gearbox driveshaft wedged through the fingers of the clutch plate
Nightmare. I think anyone attempting this in future should consider removing the exhaust downpipe, draining the coolant, and dropping the engine right out
I'll be changing the clutch tomorrow if it turns out I have enough brake fluid, but I have absolutely no idea how to get the gearbox back in the car. It's not lightweight in any way shape or form - and I'm not exactly weedy in build! I'll have to take plenty of painkillers just to be able to balance it on a jack though
I was thinking you'd just slap a jack under it, free it from the 'box, pull the jack away from the engine then drop it. That scenario couldn't be further from reality.
Differences from the HOWTO and notes for an ES9J4 V6 coupe: (mainly for my reference when doing the picture HOWNOTTO)
The engine needs to be rotated at a VERY nasty angle at a minimum BEFORE the box is separated (else the mount will catch)
The cruise control bag MUST be removed else the gear selector arm will catch on it, and that bag will happily support the weight of the gearbox if it's caught on the clutch plate. The subframe needs removing to get to this.
The subframe MUST come out
That bloody intermediate bearing... grrr... possible with the subframe in but for the love of gawd don't!
2 people are a MUST for getting the gearbox out. It's too heavy for one person to manhandle alone, and trying to balance it on a jack while it's driveshaft is still engaged in the clutch is completely futile
The starter is behind a heat shield behind the front exhaust pipe, then there's 3 bolts but only 2 are visible. You may need to undo the exhaust clamp to get to the 3rd. You have to unplug the oil temperature sensor before you can slide it back
The flywheel sensor is very easily forgotten (I hope I haven't snapped mine)
The diff speed sensor's under a little bag
The gear selector cables can be removed from under the bonnet, but the subframe needs to be removed to refit the clips
The gearbox mount bracket CANNOT be removed without removing the aircon pipework
Need to see if there's any screw holes that lead to the front/top subframe mounts. It'll be a massive help to anyone else if you can get some WD40 in there and onto the nut and/or bolt thread
A breaker bar hande will fit nicely between the gearbox and it's mount via the wheelarch
You want at least 2 sets of ratchet action axle stands, especially if attempting solo. My 2nd set are bar-through-hole types and are bloody difficult to use with one hand while you're holding up the gearbox with your other hand
Essential hand tools: 1/2" breaker bar, 1/2" ratchet, 10,11,13,15,16,18,19,21mm sockets AND ring spanners, 6mm allen socket, long and short 1/2" extension bars, 35mm 1/2" impact socket (36mm will work), 1/4" 72-tooth ratchet, 7,8,10,11,13,16mm sockets, T20,T30,T40 torx bits/sockets, wire brushes (fine and course), WD40, Brake cleaner, big tough flathead screwdriver for levering, large mole grips, 2lb hammer, fags, beer, painkillers, inspection lamp (NOT a torch!), high lift jack, any other jack, lumps of wood, cable ties, bits of wire (for tying stuff up), patience. lots and lots of patience
This is the coupe too - the saloon has considerably less space under the bonnet
This has been a VERY educational project, but so far f**k me it's not been easy
Hopefully getting it all back together will be a lot quicker
<steve_earwig> I think this forum is more about keeping our cars going with minimal outlay than giving our cars more reason to go bang